Happy Easter! Also, I Come Bearing Pics!

I meant to do a TWO MONTHS OLD post about three weeks ago, but Forest uploaded the pics to the wrong computer (his work computer) and I couldn't access them. I know - excuses, excuses! 


Here are their best shots (imagine that in a Tyra Banks voice):

Obligatory screaming Zoe pic

She's really growing into this hair bow, no?

 Best.Egan.Face.Ever.

We're actually having a caption contest on this picture at work

My sweet boy :)

And now, a random update, in no particular order!


We took them to see the Easter Bunny this morning. Nothing like a little procrastination! And, yes, Zoe really is that much tanner than Egan. How weird!

There was a baby in line right behind us who was exactly the same size as my peanuts...she was 2 weeks old! In fact, she may have been a bit bigger.  We weighed them yesterday and, at 11 weeks old, Egan is 8 lbs 11 oz and Zoe is 8 lbs 12 oz (he's doing a good job of catching up!).

Daycare is going well - they LOVE it. Especially Zoe - she smiles and smiles from the moment we walk in. Egan, being a very serious boy, is not so demonstrative of his enthusiasm, but he has a fun time playing too.  They are everybody's favorite because they're new and teeny.  I know they're in great hands and that is comforting. Plus, they have each other, so they're not out there in the world alone! :)

With 3 weeks down, I'm still finding it to be hard to transition back to being a working mom.  My main complaint is that pumping is not going as well as I expected. I have to pump each evening after their feedings to get the full amount they need (they're taking three 4 oz bottles per day). So that's disappointing. I'm hoping it will get better, but from everything I've read, I should probably be expecting it to get worse! I may need to do the fenugreek or mother's milk tea or whatever. Or I could just get comfortable with them supplementing with formula for their 3rd bottle, but I'd rather not. And it's not because I have anything against formula - Katie had formula when I was in class when she was a babe.  So I don't really know why I'm beating myself up about it.

When I was on maternity leave I was really liking how much I was able to take care of around the house and how many snuggles I was getting. Now that I'm back at work, I'm still trying to keep up with the house but I'm not wiling to sacrifice any snuggle time to do so.  Until Thursday, I was trying to do all of the baby care myself in the evenings unless one of them got REALLY mad while I was feeding or changing the other.  I was secretly resenting Forest for not helping me more - yet I wasn't asking for any help.  It was like I only wanted him to do the "overflow" babycare (just what I wasn't able to get to when I was tending to the other baby) but I was expecting him to read my mind and know when I wanted help and when I didn't.  

For example, he has class on Tuesday nights and then this week he was invited to a happy hour on Wednesday.  I acted like I was fine if he went, but I really wanted him to realize on his own that he shouldn't go - leaving me to do everything two nights in a row. I felt like my choices were to be demanding and "forbid" him to go, or be passive aggressive and give him the cold shoulder when he got back.  I chose the latter, never considering the adult option: talking to him about how I felt.

I finally realized that I was trying to be a martyr and that's just dumb. I have a wonderful husband who has always been downright doting, waiting on me hand and foot, and he wants to take care of the babies, but he was just doing his own thing: waiting for me to tell him what I wanted him to do (that's a man for ya - even the wonderful ones can be dense sometimes).  

So we finally talked about it on Thursday. I said I would just tell him when I needed help rather than doing everything myself, muttering snide, passive aggressive comments under my breath about him not helping, and/or silently resenting him.  He said he would pay more attention and anticipate all of our needs more.  It's been much better the past 2 days :)

The babies are finally giving us big, adorable, toothless grins and it melts my heart every time.  Whenever Egan smiles (his are more stingy than Zoe's) I get so excited, squealing with delight, that I think I scare him and then he looks at me like I'm crazy again.  Oh well.  We're learning more about each other all the time :)

Early-Phase Egan Smile 

(it starts out like this then he opens his mouth really big and sticks his tongue out a bit. It's truly delightful)

Zoe, loving on their new toy and enjoying the Bunny Swing 

(how seasonally appropriate!)

This afternoon I decided they need to play together a little bit. They are usually hanging out on separate boppys, in separate sides of the crib, with separate parents, etc. They seemed to enjoy each other's company and we got some pretty cute looks out of them:

Egan smiling at Mommy; Zoe smiling at Daddy :)

I guess that's all for now. Look for the THREE MONTHS OLD update coming soon! :)

Goings On

I can't believe I only have one more week off work to spend full time with the babies.  That is going to suck, isn't it?  They will be seven weeks old tomorrow.

Part of the daycare paperwork is to define a schedule for the babies for them to follow.  Despite my initial good intentions, I haven't really enforced a schedule around here.  They demand their feedings about every 3 hours, but I don't have set times that I have them eat and I don't insist that they eat at the same time.  But now I need to plan for how many feedings I expect them to have at daycare so that I can pump milk over the next 10 days so they have something to eat!  I'm thinking I'll have them eat at 6 am (after my shower, before we leave for work), 9 am, 12 pm, 3 pm at daycare, and then 6 pm and 9 pm at home.  And if they want midnight and 3 am feedings, that's fine too.  Any advice or feedback on this plan?  They'll be 8 weeks old when they start daycare.

I had my 6 week follow-up appointment yesterday.  I am at 201 lbs! I know that may not sound like a number one would excitedly put an exclamation point behind, but that is actually low for me these days.  When I successfully lost 25 pounds on Weight Watchers last year, that got me down to 199 lbs. That's pretty much where I was when we started the FET cycle. So for breast feeding and twin tending alone to get me within 2 pounds of that is exciting.   And I eat ALL THE TIME. I am seriously ravenous all day.  I guess supplying milk for 2 babies burns a lot of calories. Who knew? Now that I'm cleared to exercise, maybe I can truly get to a weight I'm happy at.  My short term goal is 185 lbs. I would say that I'll keep you updated on my progress, but anyone who has read my blog for any period of time knows that I am not a reliable updater!

In exciting news:

• Egan slept through the night last night! I don't know how he did that. Of course, now I'm worried that he's not getting enough to eat because he's sleeping so much.  Worry: it's what I do.
• Zoe has officially rolled over twice.  Once at 5w2d and again at 5w6d.
• Egan rolled over twice in a row this week at 6w3d

Well-rested Egan after sleeping through the night

Zoe: Tummy Time Extraordanaire

They aren't smiling yet. I am really looking forward to that! I guess they'll be a little slower since they were 4 weeks early, but I am certainly ready for a little encouragement that they like me - at least some small fraction as much as I like them :)  Last night Egan was fussing up a storm for Forest while I was nursing Zoe.  After she was finished I asked him if he wanted to trade. He said, "I would feed him if I were you" but he had just eaten an hour and a half before.  I was very proud that I snuggled him and talked to him and he calmed down.  If I can't get a smile, at least I have that!

Lis asked last time about the crib arrangement.  Right now they are in the same crib with a divider.  This is because Forest and I have not yet moved out of their room. I consider it their room now because it has all of their clothes, toys, and care items in it, but the only thing of ours in there is the bed!  Once we get the den fixed up and converted to our room, we will set up the other crib and they'll sleep separately in the same room. That's the plan, anyway.  At our pace, we should have that done by the time they start kindergarten ;)

Emotionally, I've never been happier.  It kind of feels like I've been in a fog for the last 34 years or so, waiting for my life to begin.  I guess I had an Egan and Zoe shaped void in my heart, and now it is full.  I feel like a better mom, better housekeeper (still not great, but definitely better!), and better wife.  We'll see if this keeps up when I go back to work - I sure hope it does!  I am just so thrilled to finally have these delicious babies that I wished, prayed, waited, longed, cried and worked for.  I told Katie the other day that I feel like I hit the Mommy Lottery to have 3 spectacular children.  But there has definitely been a lot of heartbreak and pain to get here, so right now I feel Karma Neutral.

So that's where I'm at today. Much love and hugs to you all!

Amy

For Your Viewing Pleasure

FET #1 Worked!

It's Twins!

Last belly shot: at the hospital on D-Day

February 4, 2011

36w2d

Brand New Zoe 

(some parts blurred for modesty) :)

Brand New Egan 

(with a convenient strategically placed foot for modesty)

In the OR

In Recovery

Munchkins together in the bassinet

Katie & Zoe

Daddy takes awesome pictures

Zoe Comes Home

February 8, 2011

First Nap at Home

Egan in the NICU incubator to stay warm

One of the many days spent in the NICU with Egan

Zoe's first pediatrician appointment

1 week old

February 11, 2011

A NICU feeding

A NICU bath

First real bath for Zoe

(her cord fell off at 8 days)

Egan in an open crib

February 14, 2011

Finally Home! 

February 15, 2011

So in love!!!

6 Days Old: A Quick Update

I have so many posts brewing in my head: C-section not being as scary/weird/painful as I'd imagined, NICU stay for Egan, velamentous cord insertion and a true cord knot for Zoe, realizing my preferred Attachment Parenting style was/is more for my comfort than for the babies', etc. but it's really busy around here! I thought I should come on, though, just to let you all know that the babies were delivered safely and are doing well. 


They are also spectacularly gorgeous (in my humble opinion):

L: Egan Mitchell (born 2/4/11 at 3:22 pm, 4 lbs 12 oz, 18 3/4")

R: Zoe Ruth (born 2/4/11 at 3:19 pm, 5 lbs 5 oz, 19")

Thank you so much for your comments and well wishes!


Love and hugs,
Amy

Today's the Day!

Well, I'm at the hospital! At my regular OB appointment this morning (36w2d) I was 3-4 cm dilated and Zoe is presenting toes first. So they want me here at the hospital in case my water breaks and I'm scheduled for a C-section at 2pm CST!