4dp5dt

I remember when abbreviations like "4dp5dt" were unintelligible to me.  In case there is an innocent reading my blog, that means "four days past 5-day transfer", or...am I pregnant? When should I pee on a stick? (becuase we ALL know I'm not waiting for a stinking beta no matter how ridiculously early it's scheduled).  This is basically equivalent to 9dpo in a "normal" cycle.

I wish I felt pregnant. I wish I would throw up on my keyboard right now because someone walked by my cubicle with a lunch that would normally not bother me but, in my knocked up state, caused me to projectile vomit.  Yes, my brain is fully aware that such symptoms do not generally occur at this early, early stage, but what I wouldn't give!

I had a little "feeling" last night that I am pregnant, with one boy. How weird is that?  If you don't know me, it may not sound weird at all, but I've really never been able to picture myself having a boy.  When Katie was born I was soooooooooooooooooooo relieved she was a girl. Back in that day (1994) my doctor didn't do routine ultrasounds.  He was very old school.  He felt that women had been having babies without the information provided in an ultrasound for millenia and that, barring any indication of a problem with the pregnancy, ultrasounds just represented another needless imaging procedure contributing to skyrocketting healthcare costs.  How NOT FUN is that?  But, alas, he was the one calling the shots and I was the one with the non-problematic pregnancy, so I couldn't really complain.  But it would've been *nice* to know that I would soon have a precious baby girl instead of a...boy (I'll leave out any negative description about how I would have felt about having a boy). But, now, I think I'm trying to get my mind around the (very real) possibility that I could be incubating a blastocyst whose genome contains a Y-chromosome.

Katie is being all super adorable about the prospect of a baby brother or sister.  Which is good - her reaction could easily go either way.  Her dad has 2 kids from his current marraige - girls aged 3 and 4.  Her emotions about them range pretty broadly (from UGH - they are SO ANNOYING/BABIES SUCK to AWWWW - I LOVE THESE TWO) but I feared we'd be dealing with a whole new thing if someone else dared to move into HER mommy's uterus.  But, so far, she's being very positive and sweet.  I think she's more comfortable that we did IVF so she can imagine the conception as a decidedly non-intimate phenomenon.  So, you know, you're welcome, Katie :).

Anyway, that's my update - not much of an update. Just wishin' I was pregnant...but that's sort of the theme of the blog...so you didn't really need me to tell you that today...but...anyway...nevermind. 

Signing off now!